M B A

Soooo it's finally official official....I got my diploma in the mail! I can put those three little letters after my name (if I so choose) MBA...woot woot!!

I haven't decided if I will or not...my co-worker said that I should because I worked hard for it, and I did, but I just don't know. I don't really know anyone who does it...doens't mean that I shouldn't though!

Not much else is going on....I've got two baby showers to go to in the next two weeks and I've been busy making things for those. One of them I'm co-hosting because it happens to be my sister, but there's plenty of help for that one.

The other one is for one of my favorite people and I've had fun getting things together for it! I'm going to have to give an IOU though because I wasn't able to do as much as I wanted to!

Here's hoping for some fun!!! I'm also going to Charleston this weekend...just for two days, but should be fun!

Woot woot! Hope all is well bloggerverse. 

Woot Woot!!! New Developments!!!!

Things are going pretty okay for me lately and things are also suppppper busy!

However, I can now mark something off my bucket list (and it's totally nerdy, so brace yourself) I finished my MBA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, it requires that many exclamation points. I turned in my final projects on Tuesday and found out that I received A's on both of them last night. I may or may not have done a little graduation dance in my kitchen! It's insane. It took me two full years because working full time and going to school is hard stuff! (props to those of you who did it in undergrad!)

of course it's going to be WAY MORE awesome than this because it's an actual diploma, but you get the point

The holidays are coming up and I love this time of year so that's fantastic as well.

All in all, not much to complain about here. Days are still tough without my friend Jim, and I have random break downs on a somewhat regular basis, but it's getting easier to face Wednesday nights without him and that's comforting.

So, go out there, cross things off your bucket list, friends!!! It's exhilarating!

xoxo

November is all about giving thanks....

So,  a lot of people are using this month and each day within this month to list what they are thankful for.

My blog has been slightly Debby Downer this month so I thought I'd go ahead and list out what I've come up with these past 9 days.

Here it is:

1. This song: By Your Side by Tenth Avenue North
2. My niece's karate kick through the belly of my very pregnant sister and into my hand! 
3. My friend who very lovingly guided me through my panic attacks
4. Seat warmers! And laughter!
5. A very special lady who takes time to put others first
6. New life!!! 
7. Good friends who you can watch sporting events with!
8. My hubby and downtime made for relaxing with him
9. My co-workers

That's it! All 9 days written down in a nice, little note!

What are you guys thankful for this month?

He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.  ~Epictetus

It's never easy to lose the ones you love...

Lately, I've been missing my friend Jim more than I'd probably like to admit. I pretend like every day is fine and I can get through most days without thinking about him too much, but I can't.

There are too many constant reminders. Thinks he used to say or do or meetings that we used to attend together. I know that it's all part of the healing process, but it sure doesn't make it hurt any less.

And I've really been missing my friend Hilary. We had a "break-up" of sorts. And I know it was probably for the best, but here lately, I've just wanted to call her and say "I miss you." Or did you see that stupid commercial? I've just wanted to hear her say something silly and make me laugh because I've so desperately needed a laugh these past few weeks. But, I also know, that I was honest with her. And I said things that I can't take back, nor do I want to. It would have been great if we could have worked things out, but sometimes, things in life simply aren't meant to be.

But it's still hard to lose the ones you love...whether it's a passing in this life or a break-up that was inevitable, it's not easy to say good-bye to the ones who had such a prominent role in our lives.

As for Jim, I hope he's found peace and happiness on the other side. As for Hilary, I just pray that she's happy and healthy. Because, regardless of whatever happened between us, she's an amazing person and she deserves that.

What's that one saying....if you love something you should set it free and if it loved you, it'll come back again....or something like that. Pretend I'm wise and eloquent.

Holy panic attack, Batman!

Soooo last week was not so great. It started out like any other normal week, but about Wednesday, things took a very dramatic turn for the anxious.

Wednesday, during my workout, I started feeling like my heart was beating more rapidly then it normally did and I just wasn't feeling that awesome. Overall, I felt like something was wrong. I wasn't sure what and thought it might have to do with the fact that I had a 5 hour energy that day and had stayed up late the night before. But, I'd had 5 hour energies before and never had this kind of reaction. Plus, according to the pint sized bottle, it's equivalent to 1 cup of coffee...so that didn't make any sense.

Wednesday night was just off. I just didn't feel right though I couldn't pinpoint what was wrong exactly. When I tried to go to bed, I felt like my entire body had restless leg syndrome. I COULD NOT get to sleep. I spent about 2 hours tossing and turning and sitting up and trying to take 10 deep breaths. I knew something was wrong when I couldn't get past 3 or 4 deep breaths. Finally, my hubby came in the bedroom, expecting me to be asleep, and was shocked to see me sitting up on the side of the bed. He asked what was wrong and I explained everything to him. His suggestion was to lie down together and him put pressure on me by squeezing me tight. I like to think it was kind of like this. The pressure helped ease the tension in my body and I was able to fall asleep.

The next morning, I woke up thinking that everything was great. But, I was still feeling more anxious than normal. But, by about 8:30 I knew that was not the case. I was tense. I was panicked and I knew that I was having a repeat of the night before. I texted a friend who happens to be a therapist and she called me and talked me through the worst of the attack. She encouraged me to call the doctor, which was already on my list, so that I could get a pill for the severe anxiety that I was clearly experiencing. So, I did and a quick visit to the doctor and the pharmacist took away the worst of the anxiety.

The thing that sucked the most about these two incidents is that I hadn't had a panic attack in so long that I was absolutely terrified. The anxiety took hold of me and my fear of the situation and what was happening to my body was off the charts. The worst part? I don't even know what triggered the attacks. Granted, most people can't pinpoint their anxiety to one situation or another, it's more of an overall anxious feeling, but it was absolutely debiliitating. If it wasn't the anxiety and panic making it impossible for me to function, it was the shear terror combined with not having any control over my thoughts or feelings.

Yup, last week was tough. But the weekend proved to be better and was somewhat low key resulting in a panic attack free weekend. Hopefully, that's the new trend.

Thank goodness for a hubby who "thundershirts"