The problem with assumptions and misconceptions...

The problem with misconceptions and assumptions is that often times, you're wrong. Wrong about what you're thinking or assuming and wrong about the person that you're thinking or assuming those things about.

Example:
I'm at work last Friday and a group of us are playing Taboo in a conference room for our lunch break. The group has met before and it's not a big deal, but this was my first time to join for a game day. I was pretty stoked about it to say the least because a lot of my favorite co-workers are in this lunch group. This particular day, we were all kind of ragging on each other extra hard and it definitely was not the type of day where you could bring your sensitivities with you.

We're sitting around harping on each other and after a few comments are made by me towards one person (not really towards, I merely repeated things she said) I get yelled at for "being a bitch".
Here are my thoughts about this person:

1. She is jealous of my relationship with another person at our office
2. She doesn't like me and therefore assumed I was picking on her because she had preconceived notions about who I was and what my personality is really like

After much deliberation, I finally ask her to join me in a conference room so we can discuss the situation. Of course it is littered with defensiveness and it was probably not as useful as I would have hoped. But I did make the point that I expect her to at least show me respect while we're in the office and that I didn't appreciate her actions or what she said to me.

Example number 2:
I have a really good friend who is currently at war with a significant other of a family member. For whatever reason, this girl has decided to publicly berate my friend and basically call her out for things that I think are far from the truth.

My friend has tried on numerous occasions to talk to the girl about these instances, but she refuses to think that she is doing anything wrong. She uses her blog to talk poorly of my friend and to make assumptions about my friend. Instead of trying to talk to my friend and figure out the truth about whatever sparked her hate in the first place, she just continues to talk badly about her. It's funny because in some of her posts she talks about God and how God will provide for her. I find it hard to believe that God is going to want to do anything for you when you are being such a poor example of a good human being...but I digress.

It pisses me off because the things she is saying about my friend are false on almost all accounts. For one, she claims that my friend hates her. I find that hard to believe since my friend is severely open minded and has compassion for just about everyone. And for two, she thinks that for whatever reason my friend is trying to make her life miserable. If you understand reason number one, you understand why reason number two cannot be true.

I've been compelled to call this girl out several times, but out of respect for my friend, I have refrained from saying anything. In the future, if she breaks up with my friend's family member, I think all gloves are off and I will send hate mail to this girl until I have nothing left to say.

Personally, I think she's battling some serious inner demons if she's going to pick on my friend.

SO my point in this long ramble is that if you're assuming something about someone that you don't know very well, maybe you should try to get to know them before you let yourself blow up publicly. And it's highly likely that your assumption is wrong. The thing about assumptions and misconceptions is sometimes people take them to far and they push sweet, intelligent girls like my friend an I to the brink and we unleash a hell the likes of which you've never seen.

"Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength:"
 ~ Arnold Schwarzenegger