Side note: I've gone public again because I don't care who reads my blog. I wrote it to help me vent and deal with things in my life. If some random person on google finds that helpful, then good. If someone I don't want to read my blog chooses to snoop and still read it, then that's their thing, not mine.
Moving on....my friend Preston has been gone for a week and two days now. I'm still pretty numb about the whole thing. I was pretty sick last week, and during that time, I kind of forgot that he was gone. I was going to text him about some of the crazy dreams I've been having on my meds, but I went to to send it and remembered that he was gone. It's too bad you can't send texts to the afterlife. I'm sure he'd have a lot to tell me. I miss him. But when I start really getting down about him being gone, little things pop in front of me and remind of him and make it a little less painful. Example: yesterday, as a storm was rolling in, I wanted to text him for the radar picture so that I could get the truth on the situation, and remembered that I couldn't. At that instant, a truck with Alaska plates came barreling off the highway and cut me off.....I had to giggle. Totally a Preston move. Then, as I'm getting close to home, it starts pouring on me when the sun is out and everything is perfectly nice and sunny.....another Preston move...just to giggle he'd make it rain in the middle of an otherwise nice, sunny day. The pain of knowing that he's gone is hurting a little bit less, although I still want to reach out and get a big bear hug. And I know that when we do the Big D Climb this year, my heart is going to break all over again.....into a million tiny pieces.
But I'm also learning that our time here on this earth is far too short. We never know what adversity is going to face us tomorrow, so we have to make the most out of today. We have to tell people we love them and we have to be friends to our friends. There's no room for regrets. And that's something Preston believed too. Life is too short to spend your time wishing you wouold've done something and instead you should cherish the life you have and do the things you want to do. I can't remember the quote that Preston loved to remind me of off the top of my head but it was something like....life is meant to be lived barely sliding into your ending. Meaning you shouldn't live your life slowly and without adventure but instead burn the candle at both ends and go crazy!
I intend to take his advice more in my life now. Help myself and others see the small things in life. The beauty in approaching thunderheads or a tornado. The beauty in friendship even if you spend your time miles apart. And the beauty in a life lived to it's fullest even if it's extremely short. It's what P would want.
No comments:
Post a Comment